Random Thoughts by Missy

I think a lot through out the day. Here is just a sample of my current random thoughts:

--When I clean my floor, I use the Swifter Wet Jet and then when there a stubborn piece of gook (I always wonder what it is), I use my Pampered Chef nylon scraper and just scrape it right off. The other day at the grocery store, I saw a worker mopping and then he had this scraper on a stick! It struck me how we did similar things...and how I really would like it if I had that tool.

-- My walk with the kids would have really been perfect if: the kids were patient enough to let me talk to the neighbors, the kids actually stayed in the stroller, and Ben hadn't pooped and peed in his underpants.

--I like watching Oprah and Gayle's cross country car ride. I love seeing the other side of Oprah. They are acting like it is so much work and yet I would love to take a car ride and see the outdoors and have that kind of freedom!

--Oprah hates listening to music and wants to be alone with her thoughts. Gayle loves singing to the music and enjoys conversation. I'm a big thinker and I often forget to turn on the radio, so I guess I identify with Oprah. And yet, I can really enjoy a good conversation. What do you prefer to do on a long car ride?

--I'm starting to think those poops in the diapers were not such a bad thing. So far today, Mary pooped in the shower with me and Ben pooped in his pants (which fell onto the kitchen floor when I took them off). The past couple of days I've been having more contact with the poop then I'm used to. The diaper is a nice, clean way to take care of it. Underpants do not come off very neatly when poop is in there. I do have to say...I'm glad Ben is pooping and not holding it in.

--Today I saw an interview of Sean Penn. I realized that I like him. Even though he's kinda tough and mean...I like authentic people. I like it when people show their true colors and aren't fake. Even if it's not the prettiest picture, I'd rather see the real picture. Which makes me realize, I like interviews. In movies you see who the stars are pretending to be, but in an interview you see who they really are (most of the time).

--Janet Jackson was on Oprah the other day (really, this is my last Oprah story). And first, I have to say that I enjoy Janet as an entertainer and would love to see her in concert...but I do wish she wouldn't have to sell the sex all the time. And I don't believe for a minute that she really had a wardrobe malfunction at the Superbowl. I really like her boyfriend though. He seemed very real.

--Ted just called from his golf weekend. It feels so good to give him a gift like this. Mainly because I know how good it feels when it's done for me! He stayed up 'til 3:30am playing poker and woke up at 6:30 to play golf. They got three hours of sleep, but he's having a great time.

--I watch Charlie and the Chocolate Factory every day because it's Ben's favorite movie. I have to say it's a very clever and entertaining movie. I could be stuck with something much worse!

--We'll definitely miss Ted this weekend so I'm trying to think of ways to make it fun. Tonight, I'm thinking we'll have a movie night. Tomorrow morning is Abby's game (8am!!). My mom said she'll see if Dad will put off his work-out so he can watch the kids while my mom and I go to Abby's game. I'll just let the kids play the rest of the day and then in the evening we're going across the street for a birthday party for two birthdays. Sunday, mom will watch the younger kids while I take the older ones with me to mass. Ted will be home that morning. I don't think it'll be that bad, but I wouldn't ever want to be a single mom. It's much better with him. :-)

If You Had an Extra Five Hours....

What would you do? Last Spring, I decided to enroll Ben and Mary in a Parent's Day Out program which would give me five free hours a week!!! I dreamed about it all summer...and now it's here. So the question is (posed by my friend, Ann), what have I been doing with my five free hours a week? I would have to say that so far, the number one way I spend my five hours is running errands. I know it doesn't sound all that gratifying, but you just don't know. I tend to avoid errands at all costs with the kids. I put off returns. I shop on eBay instead of the stores whenever I can. I grocery shop on the weekends. I just don't do errands with the kids. So having this 5 extra hours of free time a week, I have so far, spent a lot of it on errands and freed up mine and Ted's time.

But those five hours are sacred. I won't just run any errand or do just anything. You would think it's a great day to mow the lawn, right? For some reason that day feels too precious to mow the lawn. One week I had Sam and Abby watch Ben and Mary in the basement while I mowed the lawn! I had a free day the very next day, but by golly, I was NOT going to spend it mowing the lawn! It felt so good knowing that I had preserved just a little more time for that day.

Many of the accomplishments that I list on my "Snapshots" are done on my "day off". For example, I bought my guitar stand and music light on that day. I visited baby Leah on that day because Ben and Mary scream at the sight of my sisters dog and it lasts the whole visit (even when the dog is not in the room). I also ran all the copies for my song sheets and prayer booklets on that day. A lot of good practical stuff gets accomplished. One day I helped my mom on the computer. I cringed inside because I knew my valuable time was awastin', but you have to be a good steward of any gift and this time is a gift....and she was so appreciative.

Is this what I really want to do? Do I really want to run errands on my precious day off? Not really. It's more out of necessity. What would I really like to do? Hmmmm....I had visions of cropping, cleaning, organizing my storage room and lunch dates. I still hope to do some of these. The year is still young. In fact, I have two lunch dates scheduled in October. One with another stay at home mom who is also getting a break from her kids, and the other is a working mom. I'd really like to schedule a lunch date with Ted. It hasn't worked out yet, but I plan to.

What would you do if you had an extra five hours a week...totally free? No kids, no work, no spouse...what would you do?

What's the Capital of.....

I just finished helping Sam study 10 of his State Capitals. I love word associations. We used them heavily this time. Here is a sample:

Alabama has mountains of gum (we just made that up) -Montgomery
Arkansas--I said this with the emphasis on the Arrrkkkk part because RK is in Little ROCK
VerMONT--MONTpelier
New York--AlbaNY (get it NY? New York)
New Jersey--I told him to picture a jersey with the word TRENTON
Concord--Ok...it's the capital...but I said it in a really haughty voice and told him that rich people like to buy NEW things like hampsters....NEW HAMPSHIRE
Louisiana--He's supposed to think of his sister, Abby (middle name Louise). Pretend you hit Abby with a BATon Rouge. (He remembers this one the best).
D-d-d-d Delaware--D-d-d-d-d-Dover (Like saying D-d-d-d-d-Dora!)
Rhode Island--Providence begins with a P. You can pee on a rode on an island (for privacy).

We had so much fun talking in accents and Sam actually being allowed to say he could hit Abby with a bat or pea on a rode...but you know what? They worked!

A Snapshot (Maybe it's more like a video clip 'cause it's really long!!!)

What's at the top of my to-do list?
--Get through the weekend (Ted is leaving for a golf weekend on Thursday and coming back Sunday)
--Catch up on laundry
--practice guitar for retreat coming up in 11 days

What have I accomplished?
--Printed 40 booklets full of responses from my CHRP group on questions regarding why, how and when they pray.
--Printed 40 song pamphlets of 25 or so songs for the CRHP retreat
--Had someone copy master CD's of songs that will be played on retreat --each participant will get a CD (and so will the team)
--Bought a guitar stand and a battery operated light so I can see my music in dim lighting
--Visited, held, fed and changed the diaper of my brand new niece, 9 lb 6 oz, Leah
--Bought groceries for the parents of said niece (I'm so practical...I don't bring flowers) and delivered them the same day I visited.
--Had a birthday party for Abby who is now EIGHT!!!
--Researched and selected my own Christmas gift (to be mentioned later)
--3 eye Doctor appointments (me, Ted and Sam)

What's bugging me?
--Ben won't poop on the potty chair
--I don't have the will power to keep food out of the family room and I've had apple sauce, gogurt and shredded cheese all spill at various times. I'm just all about keeping them happy and I hate stirring it up. I wish I could just say NO.
--I have been a poor housekeeper. I want to focus more on this.
--My lack of blogging

What have I said I was going to do but I haven't?
--The darn pile of clothes that was on top of the armoir in my laundry room (outgrown clothes) has been put in a basket and shoved into the forgotten dark hole of my storage room where they will be forgotten and never placed in their rightful home. Ugh. (It was a last minute birthday preparation thing)

What's my latest obsession?
--Ok...are you ready?? I have a new toy that I want for Christmas. I've been researching it on the internet and shopping oneBayy do price it. It's a.........PDA!!!! I'm a stay at home mom who desperately wants a PDA. You know...one of those Palm Pilot thingies? Yes that's me...I'm not a high powered executive who's reading huge Excel spreadsheets. I don't need power point presentations at the touch of a button. I don't need to dictate long memos into a voice recorder but gosh darnit I want a PDA!!!

Ok...I'll settle down. Let me tell you why I want one of these. First of all, I'm not kidding myself, I could probably serve the same function with a piece of paper and a pencil, but that is NO FUN! I love Microsoft Outlook. I enter all of our functions, activities and appointments on the Calendar. I love Contacts. I enter addresses, phone numbers, cell numbers, directions to houses...all in this handy little program. I love the Task system. I love getting reminders that I have an appointment (ok... so they aren't high powered executive things, but they are: Drs appointments, luncheons, soccer games, cubscout meetings, etc). All of these functions in Outlook can be downloaded to a PDA and carried with me wherever I go! NO need for duplication. I won't need a separate calendar in my purse (which I never update and is useless anyway), I won't need a separate piece of paper for my shopping list, or a separate address book for phone numbers, etc...it's all in one place! I never was good about programming numbers into my cell phone. Now I wouldn't have to. Just download it from the computer! Currently, I put my To Do lists on a notebook, but if I had this PDA, I would use the Task function for all of my To Do's and you can cross them off as I go.

Oh yah...it has a voice recorder too. So I can digitally record a reminder, an update on the kids that I want to enter in "Footprints" when I have time, or send a message of the kids screaming. "Footprints" also lets you enter a sound byte on any day. So it's like putting a recording in your journal...capturing the kids voices or cute things they say. If I had more time to spend on this blog (and one day I will), I would like to put sound bytes in my blog. I know someone who recorded her child's fit and it was awesome! And another thing...it plays MP3's. Is that not the coolest?

Now, being the tight wad that I am (not so tight, I guess, or I wouldn't be buying one), I am looking on eBay for a used one. I figured I could get one for $115 including shipping. And that's used! They go for $200-$400 new. And "Pocket PC's" are even more expensive. I've selected the Palm Tungsten T3. It came out about 2 years ago (older technology is cheaper). I know some of you are not techy at all so you probably have no interest in this stuff...but it is catching on to the mom market.

What's been making me happy?
--Most of CRHP preparation is behind me and all I have to do is practice guitar before the retreat.
--I'm excited about my new guitar stand and light (I think it's so funny these things make me happy).
--I'm starting to ease up on my nerves about the guitar playing on retreat. It'll be OK. I hope.
:-)
--Mom's Day OUT!!! Whew Hooo!!!! Another awesome day today. Mary cried at drop off but was good the rest of the day. No more crying for Ben. He jumps right in when I drop him off.
--Successful potty training by Ben! We use diapers when he wants to poop :-(, but the pee is fine 24/7 with underpants on through the night and no underpants. A huge "Praise God" on that one. --I'm a branch now. No longer a boring trunk. These activities are giving me life. I really just feel more alive. I'm happier with my kids and just happier all around. I'm so grateful for the timing of CRHP and the PTO and the PDA...and PDO (Parent's Day Out) and if I get another acronym I know you're going to jump off a cliff. I know you're sick of the acronyms "CRHP and PTO" cause I'm sick of typing it! But really, I'll type it til I'm blue in the face. I'm grateful.

One last thing, all you lurkers...could you please say HI every now and then? I'd love to hear from you. I love comments and feedback. Thank you!!

Let the Training Begin!!

You heard it right! Ben is full potty training mode. First, I'm sorry for my absence. My involvements have kept me busy on the computer....typing up songs for the retreat and stuff for PTO. But I promise, thing will slow down as soon as this retreat is over. I will write more about that this week when I do a "Snapshot".

Back to Ben...I just needed a kick in the pants to get myself back on board the potty training wagon. That kick came. Ben had his three year well visit (4 months late). I told him Ben was stubborn and that our potty training attempts ended with a lot of wet underpants and him wanting his diaper back. Deep down, I knew a lot of it had to do with me being ready to take the jump and make the commitment to do it again. He felt Ben is manipulating me and I need to "sit on him more". I told him that I kinda wanted to keep the whole experience positive and that's why I avoided that. But overall, the doctor left me with the feeling that I needed to approach this in a firmer way. He is old enough and capable. I was ready.

The appointment was Wednesday, the 13th (I went out that night so I didn't want to start then). We started the next night after Dad got home from work. That way...it wasn't a full day. We had a new bag of m & m's and he knew that was his reward if he peed in the potty chair. He was hesitant at first, because it had been a while, but then quickly remembered the routine. The next day, we had one big "uh oh" accident followed by a bunch of little squirts in the underpants that he would stop the flow until we went to the potty chair. I remember all of that. It's just a part of getting used to the whole thing. So Friday, I would say we went through about 5 pairs of underpants with all the little squirt accidents. If he ever requested his diaper back, I told him we weren't wearing diapers in the day anymore....only underpants. I said it really matter of fact, like there was no choice. When he was ready to poop, he asked for this. I told him he needed to poop in the potty chair. Well that fell over deaf ears...I guess he's afraid to do that because later I found a big ol' poop in his underpants and I realized how much underpants are not made for poop. I told him he could get a red race car if he pooped in the toilet. This has yet to happen. I figure we can focus on the pee stuff later. He's been pooping in his pants for three years...this ain't gonna happen overnight.

Saturday went great! One pair of pants all day until we had to go to church. We put pull-ups on him and he stayed dry! But he was spooked out by the old church bathroom downstairs and wouldn't go. Eventually he went in his pull-up. But I was proud of the way he stayed dry even though a pull-up really just feels like a diaper. We were at the same church's parish carnival and we knew he wouldn't go in a Johnny on the Spot so we didn't worry about the potty the rest of the night. But he did stay dry for a long time!! We changed his pull up last night and he stayed dry the whole night!! This makes me want to say "Hallelujah!!".

I've never been one to use pull-ups very long. I feel like it can prolong the training process because of how similar they feel to diapers. So we will use the pull-ups for a couple more nights and then if he stays dry...we'll do the underpants. I know we'll have accidents. I remember the kids having really deep sleeps where they wake up in soaked in urine. His mattress is protected under the sheets with waterproof pads and it's an old mattress anyway. It's like 30 years old from when Ted was a kid!!

These are the hurdles I see:

--Pooping in the toilet. When will he cave on this? I'm hoping after getting used to peeing in the toilet that he will eventually find it strange to not be pooping there too.

--Outings and peeing in other toilets. He's a boy of habit. He likes the familiar.

--Letting other people take him to the toilet. Like at Mom's Day Out. Will he be OK with this?

Anyway...we're on the journey. Now I'm eyeing Mary. I know she'll be ready quicker than Ben was. Sam and Abby I waited until they were three because I think it goes much quicker when you wait til they are ready. They both had the whole kit and caboodle taken care of in less than two weeks (naps, night time, poop) because I waited. However, I think Mary could be the exception of readiness. She's better at communicating than Abby was at her age and she's a girl (girl's are almost always ready earlier than boys). I'm thinking 2 1/2. Which isn't until the end of the school year. That seems far away, but when you think that I've been changing diapers for 9 years out of the 11 that we've been raising kids...I think I can wait 8 months to be done for good.

Snapshot Thursday (on Friday)

What's at the top of my to-do list?
--Put the clothes and shoes in storage that the kids have outgrown
--Mail off a check for my crop weekend
--Sam and Abby are off school Friday...invite a friend for each to play with that day

What have I accomplished?
--Planned and led Room Parent meeting (wooo hooo!)
--Bought digital camera for school using PTO funds
--Made Dora and Thomas pillow cases for Ben and Mary's napmats
--Cut Ben's hair
--Cut my Mom's hair
--Painted chalkboard in the basement

What's bugging me?
--Ben wanting to be carried whenever he's scared. If we go to someone's house, he wants to be picked up because he's afraid they have dogs. I had to carry him all the way down the street to pick up the lawn mower. He's HEAVY!!!
--My dirty floors and carpeting
--My habit of wanting something sweet after the kids go down
--Ben's newly intensified fits that come at the drop of the hat. For example I put his spoon in the applesauce cup and he screamed at me and threw himself to the floor. I feel like I'm walking on eggshells.

What have I said I was going to do but I haven't?
--I keep putting off taking the outgrown clothes downstairs to storage
--Nightly Bible reading. I just want to veg out at night

What's my latest obsession?
--Lately it's been planning PTO stuff. It's always on my mind. Now that the meeting is over and expect it to slow down a little
--Mission Organization (TV show)
--Catching up on things I put off over the summer like cropping and cleaning
--Birthday shopping for Abby and Sam and some Christmas shopping...all on-line!!

What's been making me happy?
--PTO--feeling like I have fun things to plan and do
--Quality time with the family (went on a miniature steam engine ride along a river and bluffs, a couple of bike ride/walks through the neighborhood park)
--Ben and Mary are going to their first day of Mom's Day Out Tuesday...I can't wait!!
--Planned crop weekend in November and another one sometime between January and March. Time to catch up!!

Whew!

I finally had my big meeting of the year. It's the only meeting I have to lead. We have 50 Room Parents and I would say about 30 made it to the meeting. Finally... the Room Parents have all been selected, notified and a Coordinator was chosen for each grade. The teachers have all been notified as to who their Room Parents are and now the work is in their court! I had to make 5o packets of information on everything they would need to know for the year...from honoring teacher birthdays, to classroom parties, to providing snacks for the faculty meetings. I have been focused on getting the Room Parents up and running and not much else. Hence, no blog.

Now I feel like the fun stuff is left. I help at all the events. Yes, I have to be there for questions...but really, most of these are answered by the teachers. I just feel like the hard part is over. It's a lot of work in a short time period. Now I can focus on other things: the house, getting the little ones ready for their first week at Mom's Day Out, practicing guitar for my CRHP retreat in October, playing with the kids.

It's been crazy around the house lately. PTO requires a lot of prep work up front at the beginning of the year. To give you an idea...here are the events we are holding this year:

Grandperson's Day - Sept 14
PTO Meeting - Sept 21
Family Trivia Night - Oct 27
Chili Kick Off - Nov 12
Book Fair - Nov 30 - Dec 7
Breakfast with Santa - Dec 2
Winter Carnival - Feb 3
PTO Meeting - Mar 15
Family Theater - Mar 17

This doesn't include a couple of McDonald's nights and Chuck E Cheese nights.

For all of these events, we had to find Chairs, pick the date and reserve the location (gym or cafeteria). We also generally talked about each one and how we could improve them from the year before. We've had about 3-4 meetings for this year already. Wow! I had no idea what went behind all this stuff! I feel so alive being a part of it all. I know that sounds cheesy...but ultimately, what this boils down to...is a stay at home mom of four who had too much time at home to say "woe is me", is now "me is busy and loving it!". It's a good, healthy thing. I have another purpose that balances the one at home. I feel important, useful, respected and needed.

I'm finding balance. Isn't that the ultimate desire? I think so. The out of balance feeling is not fun. You feel like your being tugged one way when you really want to go the other. It's a constant struggle. When you feel balanced, there's a give and a receive. And they are equal...so you don't feel like you are teetering over. I think it's impossible to feel balanced all the time. Life is full of teetering from one side to the other. I think I'll enjoy my little peice of balance right now. :-)