A New Year, A Look Back

I don't blog much these days. I am busier now with work and keeping up with the home...and just plain enjoying life. But it's been a blogging tradition of mine to look back at the year when it ends. It always amazes me what one year brings!


2008--

January
--Chaired the 80's Dance for the PTO
--Bought new furniture for the family room...delivered in March

February
--Mary is almost potty trained! She is dry all day and at night...but scared to poop on the toilet
and is struggling with constipation
--Lost 10 pounds on a Lenten diet
--Started Jazzercise

March
--Finished my family room makeover
--Battle Weary with Mary (strong will, ranging emotions, high maintenance)
--Purchased digital software for scrapbooking and decided to go completely digital!
--Made it my mission to finish all my paper scrapbooks before starting digital.

April
--Finished last even as the PTO President, Father Daugher Dance...YAY!!
--Ben and Mary are getting easier and I'm enjoying them more...another YAY!!
--Start thinking about next year. What will I do with my free time while Ben is at full time school and no PTO??
--Got a new laptop

May
--Ben turns 5
--Mary poops in the potty...FINALLY! No more pull-ups!!
--Became the new Volunteer Coordinator for the swim team and schedule 90 families to work the 200 shifts for the 6 meets
--Sam finishes 5th grade, Abby 4th, Ben--preschool.
--Camp at Meramec over the Memorial Day Weekend.

June
--Started volunteering one day a week at the Sts. Joachim and Ann Care Service
--Purchased my plane ticket for Australia!
--Lost control at the wheel and crashed and totaled our Jayco Kiwi travel trailer (on our way to Eminence). Ended up staying in a cabin part of the time and with my parents the other part

July
--Purchased a new to us 2006 Rockwood Roo. We love it! Took it to Illinios Beach State Park for it's first trip! Also purchased a better hitch. No more accidents.

August
--Took Ted on a Golf Weekend in Kansas City to celebrate his 40th!
--Brought home a new puppy named Charlie. He's a Shih-tzu/Bichon mix
--Accepted a part time position at the Care Service as the Director of Administration! Love it!!
--Sam starts 6th grade, Abby starts 4th and Ben starts FULL TIME Kindergarten

September
--Got my passport for Australia!
--Mary starts Mom's Day Out two days a week
--Mary and Ben both learn how to ride 2 wheelers this month! No more training wheels!
--Abby turns 10
--Sam starts practicing babysitting the kids for longer intervals. Abby helps him. This changes our lives drastically! From here on we don't have to take everyone else with us for errands or pick ups. Very cool!

October
--Sam turns 12
--Mother in law, Jane, finds out she has breast cancer. Has a mastectomy.

November
--Mary turns 4
--Sister, Becky finds out she is pregnant!

December
--Jane finished her Chemo
--No more babysitters. Sam and Abby do the job regularly now.
--Have a great Christmas Break with the kids

Tagged on a Meme

This is how it works:

Pass this on to 5 blogging friends. Open the closest book to you, not your favorite or most intellectual book, but the book closest to you at the moment, to page 56. Write the 5th sentence, as well as two to five sentences following that.

I'm in the middle of reading "The Shack". Here is the 5th, 6th and 7th sentence: "Mack felt like he was moving in slow motion inside the eye of a hurricane of activity happening all around him. Report filtered in from everywhere. Even Emil was busy networking with the people and professionals he knew". In this story, the lead character just found out tragic news and was still looking into the mystery of what happened.

If I had pulled a book right near me, it would have been a cookbook, because my laptop is on the kitchen counter. I didn't think you would want to hear from that. But if you want to get literal, page 56 from "Deceptively Delicious" was a picture of a pile of pancakes.

I haven't blogged in a while. I don't want to neglect my other duties that have gotten harder now that I have a job. It's nice to be tagged on a meme so I can have an excuse to say Hi. Even though most of my hits are from people who don't know what to do about their full brick wall fireplace, or they want to get ideas on how to finish their basement, or they like St. Faustina and want to read her quotes.

Today I have a Christmas Luncheon for work. So, I need to do the dishes, wrap a $5 gift and bring Mary to my sister's. I'll catch up later!!

Husband's away, the mice will play...or clean...

Ted left yesterday for his golf trip. He's not far, but he'll be gone until Sunday morning. It's funny, because, my house is cleaner when Ted is gone. It's not because he's a messy person. I think he is neater than me...it's because I clean like a maniac when he is gone. Why do I do this?It doesn't happen when he is gone for one night...it happens any time he's gone for a longer period..which doesn't happen often. I think I've figured it out why. I can feel overwhelmed with all the responsibilities when Ted is gone, so if I control the one thing I can (the house), I automatically feel that much better. So everything I pass, get's picked up, put away, folded, thrown away, etc. And I feel a little more in control.

Back to Work! and Curse to the Big Hangers!

My blogging days are fewer and farther between now. It's easier for me to update my "Twitter". Plus, I'm having computer problems that makes it hard to type. Windows Vista DOES NOT agree with me...or my computer. In about two weeks, Ted will blow it away and go back to Windows XP. Until then, my laptop occasionally acts possessed and starts backspacing at lightening speed.

Much has changed since the last time I wrote. I have a part time job! Because I am a lazy person, I copied an e-mail I sent to my Women's Group after getting the job. But before you read it, I have to say that I've been volunteering once a week at a Crisis Intervention Agency started by our parish about 25 years ago, called the Care Service. I wanted to get my foot in the door, so that, down the road, I might be able to get a paying job there:

"You know how I’ve been complaining about money lately? I guess God was preparing me. Sometimes I look back and wonder how many things he allowed to happen to me to just get me in the right frame of mind. Anyway, the concerns of paying for private high school in the future and how poor of a job we have done at saving, made me really consider working part time when Mary went to school full time (in 2 years). But just recently, I was entertaining the idea of being able to do something NOW. How great it would be to get a head start on saving that money. Funny how God works…the Administrative Director left her position just last Friday. My friend Jackie, who works at the Care Service told me she immediately thought of me and felt I should consider it, especially since they were talking about doing a job share. Wow! I told her I was interested, she wrote a nice e-mail to the Care Service Executive Director (Miriam), recommending me for the job. Miriam calls me 30 minutes after receiving the e-mail and asks me if I could send in my resume as soon as possible. I wrote one THAT NIGHT (Monday) and sent it to her. We played phone tag until she caught me yesterday at Abby’s volleyball practice. Sam was home watching the kids so it was perfect when she said, “When can we meet?”. I walked over there (our Care Service is on the school campus) and we met for an hour and a half! She told me that they had the 24 hour person and needed 16 more hours, that I could do much of it from home and the pay was more than I hoped for. At the end of her long explanation of the job, I asked if they were looking at anyone else and she said No. I accepted the job! I can’t believe all of this happened in less than a week. It doesn't usually work that way. I remember when I said I wanted to volunteer for the Care Service in hopes to have a paying job some day…and one month later I have that paying job. It’s definitely God.

Thank you for your prayers. This is a big change for me and my family, but I think one that fits us well."

Have you ever done something really quickly and then woken up the morning saying, "What did I DO?" Well, that never happened. I feel such a peace about this job and the sudden change in my life. I KNOW it was what I was supposed to do and not many things happen that clearly in my life. I'm often wondering if I'm doing the right thing or saying yes to too many things. It doesn't mean that this change has all happened with no difficulty at all. I'm adjusting to the needs of a job and the needs of home and trying to do them all well. 16 hours doesn't sound like much, but it's enough to take some time adjusting.

Since the job happened about the same time the kids went back to school, it hasn't felt too bad because my load at home has gotten lighter during the day anyway. It's just Mary at home with me now. This is how I worked out the care of Mary. Mary was already enrolled in a Mom's Day Out program 2 days a week. The days were Monday and Friday. My work days are Wed, Thur and Fri. My sister Becky watches kids in her home Monday-Wednesday. So this is what I did: I switched Mary's "Mom's Day Out" days to Thur and Fri, and Becky now watches Mary on Wednesdays! It's perfect! If I have a meeting to attend on Mon or Tuesday, I just switch out my Wednesday with the other day. The only problem is that my sister lives 30 minutes away in the opposite direction, but I'll do anything for free babysitting...and it's only one day a week. And I watch her daughter for a year and a half...so I don't feel guilty. I work with my fellow carpool lady, Jackie, the one that got me the job...so if either of us has a conflict we can easily communicate and have the other one drive home.

I love my job. I love being in a place that you feel like you are doing something meaningful and contributing to a worthy cause. I love the idea of being in an environment where you get to know a variety of people and you work together to make things better. A workplace really helps in the friendship category. I missed the social aspect and found my social life lacking during the day. However, for a long time I didn't mind because I felt I had enough to do at home raising my children. But recently, when I was working one day a week at the Care Service, I was longing to be a bigger part of it all...And now I am. Of course...not really...I don't know anything and I'm learning a lot as I go. I feel more like an encumbrance than an asset. But I'm soaking it all up like a sponge and it has reminded me how much I love to learn. It will take me a while to be an actual contributor...but that is my goal.

Moving on to other topics...10 years ago today I gave birth to my baby girl...Abby. We celebrated this weekend, so there wasn't much time to pause and let it soak in. But today I sit and think about my girl. I think about her energetic, positive nature, her ability to get to the point (sometimes too quickly), her smart mind that constantly amazes me, her strength at coordinating people and getting them all to do what she wants (some call that bossy...I like to think that she will be a good manager some day...or teacher), the glaze over her eyes when she "checks out" in front of the TV, the way she learned my digital scrapbook software in a matter of minutes, her skinny, tan body, her green eyes and blond hair, her awkward body that does amazing things on the soccer field. My baby. My girl. My tween...WHAT??

Today, when doing the wash, I took one of her shirts and thought, "Do I need a big hanger on this?" And that scared me. Big hangers scare me. I like little hangers. It means the clothes hung on them are small...that my child is still small. Big hangers mean they are growing and getting as big as me. Big hangers mean time is passing and gone are the days when their little clothes would get lost in the big clothes and barely add anything to a load of laundry. But grow they must...and everything that comes with it, must come. I see images flying across my mind: me fighting with my mom, crying in my pillow, mom smelling the smoke on my fingers as I awaited her response with dread, feeling misunderstood, lost in the middle. Does it have to be like that? Can I help her through these confusing years? Will she fly through much more easily than I did? When will she want a cell phone? When will she want a Facebook page? When will she meet her first boyfriend? For now...I don't want to worry about that. I'll just move those clothes over to bigger hangers and take one thing at a time.

A Snapshot

It's been 3 weeks since I have blogged. I keep an update via Twitter on my blog. It seems that it's all I have focus for these days. We're doing a snapshot since it's been a while and I don't know where to start:

What have I accomplished recently?

--Finished a slide show for the PTO (a favor I did for them)

--Purchased a 2006 trailer in time for a trip at the end of last month

--Washed the whole outside of the trailer after the trip

--Bought a new puppy for our family! (A Shih-tzu/Bichon Frise mix)

--Made it through the first night with said puppy

--Started training at our "Care Service" to become a Case Worker

--Agreed to help with an anti-bullying program at our school

--Purchased school supplies for 3 kids

What's on my to-do list?

--Start the process of a new year with Children's Liturgy

+Call rep about faulty listening device

+Follow up with possibly 2 new liturgists

+Create schedule for 11 liturgists for the whole school year

+Find out when I should receive the liturgy packets...copy and prepare for each liturgist

--Stay consistent on letting Charlie (new pup) out to establish good potty habits

--Catch up on my house! It's a mess!

What's been driving me crazy?

--Mary's emotional roller coasters...what will puberty be like??

--Buggy computers

--Weeds all over the back yard and in beds

--Swollen uvula that is better now...thank goodness!

--My messy house

What's been making me happy lately?

--Charlie! He's adorable and very easy so far! I didn't expect this!

--Our new camper...It was a great trip to Lake Michigan and the camper fit our needs perfectly

--I love volunteering at the Care Service. There is SO much to learn...which makes it challenging and rewarding at the same time. I feel very humble interviewing clients and listening to the run down of their financial situation.

--How good Ted is. How could I do this all without him??

--Knowing that I will have two free days a week; with Mary in Mom's Day Out and Ben starting full time Kindergarten! What will it be like to have one child home with me every day??

More Volunteering?

I remember, when I just had Mary, and Ben was only 18 months old...feeling a great desire to be a part of the world that was "out there"...the one that I saw other people participating in, but I felt like I was stuck in my home. It was a particularly hard time for me. I like to have time to do things I enjoy and at that time, I felt all I could do was take care of my children and my house and those two things were all encompassing. I knew I didn't want it any different, however. I knew I always wanted four children and this is what I would have to go through before things got easier. I remember talking to my mother-in-law and saying I would like to work for our Care Service some day. The Care Service is a Crisis Intervention Agency that is associated with my parish. Basically, it's a community outreach for the needy. I remember telling her that and feeling like it would be so far away before I could do something like that...but now the time is here!

Just yesterday, I met with the Case Manager Supervisor at the Care Service. Me and three others were given a tour, told about the organization and it's goals, and explained what a Case Manager does. I found myself so happy to be there! Like this was the place I wanted to be a part of for a long time! There was another woman there who sat off to the side. I wondered why she was there. I found out that the organization was working to get accredited and this woman, Nancy, was in charge of that process. When I heard what would be involved for her...documenting the procedures for every job, making sure everything was written up in step by step format....I got really excited! That it was I gravitate to! I do it naturally whether I'm told to or not! I remember when I was preparing for my maternity leave with Sam, I made a manual on my job! And when I was asked to take over scheduling for the call center, I had to take this man's gut feelings on numbers and get formulas out of him so someone else could do the job. And when I did PTO, it drove me crazy that there was little in writing on how to do the job. All year as President, I documented everything I did and wrote up procedures so the next person would find it easier. This is what I like to do! And this woman was doing it! I wanted to work for her!

My excitement came across the table when I am telling her that I could help, in any small way she needs it. Before I knew it, I was asked to help on the committee and I'm scheduled to train tomorrow at 1pm. She said a lot of it would probably be computer work at home. Not only this, but I still want to do the Case Manager job. They needed someone on Fridays and they happen to work a shorter shift on Friday. Case Managers work 10-1pm! No problem! Mary will be in Mom's Day Out on Mondays and Fridays 9:30-2:30...this would work perfectly! I walk in signing up for one job and walk out with two.

Just days ago, I was wondering if I was making the jump to the Care Service to quickly. I only have two five hour days free and I'm giving one of them up. Am I crazy? And didn't I offer to help the school? I was getting worried that I was starting this too soon with a child still needing care at home. The PTO was evening and weekend events with a lot of at home planning. Helping the school and the Care Service was out of the house...and I had less of that time. But for some reason, I was being pulled in that direction. And now, after meeting at the Care Service, I think it will fit perfectly. It will fit because it will feel rewarding for me to use my time this way. What else would I do? Digital Scrapbook? Maybe I can do that on Mondays :-)

Eminence Pics

Despite our travel blues (detailed in previous blog)...we had a great trip at Eminence. I thought I would show you how much:

Float trip down the Jack's Fork river with Kyle, Sam and Lisa

Sam and Kyle spend their days catching crawdads, minnows and turtles...

Me and Mary on the beach...

Enjoying a short float in the river with my Women's Group friends...

Dan and Ann enjoying some time together on the river

Singing campfire songs

Sam jumps of the rocks!

Ben used that net to catch many minnows!!

My brother Joel and his son Calvin.